Who the Fuck do they think they are?
Joburg traffic…it’s the bane of our existence…hours and hours of wasted time , just sitting in traffic. We, as Joburgers have come to accept this as part of the deal for living in this great city…
And so , we do our time.
There are some people however , who feel that they are above the law…that sitting in traffic doesn’t apply to them and that they are somehow special…and they don’t have to obey the rules of the road at all.
Specifically the taxi drivers.
Now, I will concede upfront that not all taxi drivers are the arrogant fuckwit assholes that I am going to lambaste in this post.
These pieces of shit with no regard for anyone’s safety simply drive wherever and however they see fit , openly putting the lives of their passengers and other road users at risk – and the saddest thing is – it’s our fault!
Yes – our fault! We , the normal road users , in our cars that curse and swear at them under our breaths – or openly out the window – It’s our fault that these undisciplined hooligans have evolved into the most reckless road users in Joburg.
You may ask ,” HOW IS THIS MY FAULT?”
I’ll tell you….
Would we accept this behaviour from our Kids?
Let me ask you this( for those of you that have children or pets) – DO YOU ACCEPT DESTRUCTIVE AND NEGATIVE BEHAVIOUR FROM YOUR KIDS?!
If your child is being rude , aggressive or throwing toys , hitting their siblings, throwing their food in a temper, not obeying rules of the house – DO YOU LET THAT SLIDE?!
Like hell you don’t!
Depending on your perspective on discipline , the consequences of bad behaviour could be a “time out on the thinking chair” or a starighforward poesklap!
These consequences indicate our displeasure and dissaproval of the current exhibited behaviour and should (if executed correctly) make the child realise that this behaviour is unnacceptable and (hopefully) not do it again.
Now I ask you (wif tears in my eyes) WHY THE FUCK DON’T WE DO THE SAME FOR THESE ARROGANT , SELFISH FUCKS ON THE ROADS?!
Before you start suing me for hate speech , let me clarify.
I am NOT advocating getting out of your car and giving these road hogs a serious PK – although that’s what they need…no, I am saying let us (as the vast majority of road users) guide our uneducated fellow drivers in the etiquette of road usage.
We do this by “not condoning ” or allowing negative driving patterns to be accepted and make use of our various automotive expressions to reinforce our dislike of certain behaviour.
Allow me to illuminate…
A Guide to Road Discipline.
1) When you are sitting in traffic and these assholes come from the right (or left hand lane) and then sit and force their way into the traffic stream – which you have been sitting patiently in for 45 minutes – this is what you do:
DON’T LET THEM IN !!!!!!
Its because we allow them into the traffic that they keep on doing it- cos they know that some doos is going to let them in.
JUST SAY NO- I WON’T LET YOU IN.
This goes for any driver that believes they are better than everyone else and that they don’t have to sit in traffic..they can simply overtake and get in up ahead.
Are you honestly telling me that if you were standing in a queue for 45 minutes and someone just pushed in front of you , or decided that they could just go to the front of the queue and push in that you wouldn’t make a serious fuss?
I have seen it happen in the Post office , banks and at the licencing dept, so why not in traffic?
We don’t take that shit anywhere else – so why do we accept it in traffic?
Are you seriously telling me that you believe that their time is more valuable than yours? That they have some God given right that excludes them from paying their dues in traffic?
HELL FUCKING NO.
My time stuck in traffic is lost time with my boys, or talking with my wife…and to me that is seriously time lost…
We have traffic and its a shit sandwich – but we all need to take a bite…
THIS HAS TO STOP. NOW.
So , the next time you are in traffic and a taxi,BMW or any other chop thinks that they can cut their time in traffic by trying to enter from the yellow line or meridian barrier –
Don’t Let them In!
Just close ranks with the car in front and don’t let them in.
If we all do it , it will work…
Just say ,” no – I am waiting in traffic , so can you.”
Keep them sitting on the yellow line until the cops arrive and ticket them or the traffic congestion dissipates and they can easily make their way in to the traffic stream without breaking the road rules.
And why must we do this – cos the cops don’t. And it’s our lives and time on the line.
And that’s the Joburg Truth.